I couldn’t remember the date of my last period, but I had the nagging fear that it had been more than a month.
I usually write these things down but apparently I forgot this time. I checked my phone’s calendar: nothing. I checked my agenda: nothing. Damn!
I curse myself for never using the stupid cycle app on my phone. Damn it!
Don’t panic! Don’t panic yet!
It could be stress. It’s happened before. Remember a couple of years back when your period vanished for three months due to “excessive stress”. Maybe it’s happening again. Just relax.
I go up on the scale. Damn. I’m up by two. Damn damn! This cannot be happening.
I should have taken the pill. Why can’t I be reliable for once?
What to do?
What to do?
I walk around the apartment, from one room to the other.
I should tell him.
I should call him right now and tell him my worries right away. What if he reacts badly? What if he’s not ready? I’m not ready! What if he hangs up and never answers my calls ever again. Damn it!
I should just text him the potential news.
Something like “Hi, I haven’t had my period in while and you’re the only person I’ve ever slept with!” Text him then turn off the phone for an hour or so. He’d panic for sure. Or go possibly crazy because I vanished.
Damn! I should have listened to the sexual health class at school. Damn damn damn!
Okay enough! You’re overreacting. Maybe it’s just PMS.
Yes this is probably just PMS.
Or maybe –
I’ll be giving birth to triplets in eight or nine month. Stop stop stop!
You’re overthinking again. It will be okay.
I shouldn’t have done that.
I should not have done that!
I’ll never have sex again.